Muddled thoughts. It’s mostly the best I can do today. Why do the things that are clear one moment appear incapable of resolution the next?
I try to run away from it. It works, of course. At least while I keep running. If it didn’t, it wouldn’t be What I Do. I feel alive and breathing and a part of the air around me. All that air pushing out of my lungs. It’s hard to keep so much in when so much is rushing out. The air sweeps and pushes the soul out to the surface with it. Out of its high lookout point layers and layers within, way up in the top and back of my head. That familiar vantage point. Maybe not the perfect spot. But to examine things thoroughly and not miss a thing it’s best to get the big picture. Which is difficult to do way down muddled in the mess of it all. Every side. All angles and making sense. So many sides that it’s more like running in circles. Spinning and spinning and spinning wheels. Kicking up dust so you can barely see through at all. A lonely little panicking thing spinning and spinning way up there.
